Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
