By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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