Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(805): View more from California

Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.

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(240): View more from Maryland

We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.

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(732): View more from New Jersey

Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.

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(205): View more from Alabama

I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point

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(843): View more from South Carolina

This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?

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(819): View more from Quebec

I feel awkward giving career advice while naked

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(845): View more from New York

He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him

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(516): View more from New York

I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.

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