So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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