Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I just found a bag of teeth...
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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