the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
