big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Randomize