sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Randomize