How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
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