Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
