If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
