Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
