everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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