and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
Randomize
