Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
