Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
