Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
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