Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
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