Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize