hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
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