I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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