I puked a lego.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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