some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Randomize
