operation harelip BJ is a go
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Randomize
