this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
