You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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