Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
