just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Randomize
