I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
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