Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
