would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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