You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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