Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
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