my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize