what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
