the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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