Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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