After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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