Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
