So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
