C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
