Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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