you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Sacagawea was the original milf.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize