I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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