I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I LinkedIn messaged people about jobs when I was blacked out
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize