so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
