Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
Randomize