Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize
