My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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