the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
